Let’s get real for a second. Confidence in the workplace is one of those things that everyone knows is important but rarely talks about directly. We see the results of confidence — or the lack of it — every day in meetings, emails, and even hallway conversations. Sometimes it’s loud and obvious, like the leader who monopolizes a meeting to overcompensate. Other times, it’s subtle, like the manager who avoids making eye contact or hesitates before every decision.
I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum. Trust me, I’ve had the “boss lady” moments where I felt like I was running the world — and I’ve also sat in my car with tears running down my face, wiping mayo off a Whopper, questioning whether I was good enough to lead anyone. (Yes, the mayo thing happened, and no, I still haven’t forgiven Burger King.)
So how does confidence — or the lack of it — actually show up in the workplace? Let’s break it down.
1. The Over-Confident Overcompensator
We’ve all seen this. The leader who has to assert themselves in every meeting, dominate every decision, and remind everyone (sometimes unnecessarily) of their title. They’re the ones who send lengthy “FYI” emails that no one asked for, just to assert control.
But here’s the twist: most of the time, that overconfidence is a mask for insecurity. It’s a classic case of insecurity stacking — focusing on the fear of not being enough and overcompensating in all the wrong ways.
What to Do: If this sounds like you (or someone on your team), start with intentionality. Ask: “What’s the purpose of my actions? Am I contributing to clarity or creating noise?” Reframe your focus to lead with purpose rather than proving yourself.
2. The Hesitant Hesitator
On the other end of the spectrum is the leader who hesitates. A decision that should take two hours takes two weeks. They second-guess themselves in emails, endlessly revise presentations, and say things like, “Let me think about it” far too often.
This hesitation trickles down. Teams start doubting their own decisions because their leader isn’t setting the tone. Projects stall, opportunities slip away, and morale plummets.
What to Do: Start by collecting evidence of your wins. Look back at decisions you’ve made that turned out well, even if they weren’t perfect. Remind yourself: “I’ve done this before, and I can do it again.” Confidence isn’t about knowing you’ll always get it right; it’s about trusting you’ll figure it out when you don’t.
3. The “I’ll Just Do It Myself” Micromanager
Ah, the classic micromanager. They’re the ones reviewing every email draft, sitting in every team meeting, and hovering over your shoulder asking, “What’s the status on that?”
The root of micromanagement? A lack of trust — both in others and, more often than not, in themselves. Leaders who lack confidence in their ability to guide, mentor, and develop their teams end up doing everything themselves. It’s exhausting for everyone involved.
What to Do: Practice action. Take one step to loosen the reins — delegate a task, skip a meeting, or let your team make a decision without your input. Build trust by creating space for others to step up. You might just be surprised at what they’re capable of when you give them room to shine.
4. The Silent Spectator
Some leaders avoid the spotlight altogether. They stay quiet in meetings, avoid tough conversations, and rarely speak up for their ideas. Their lack of confidence isn’t loud; it’s quietly eroding their leadership from the inside out.
This doesn’t just hurt them — it hurts their teams, too. When leaders don’t advocate for their ideas or challenge the status quo, innovation dies, and the organization stagnates.
What to Do: Focus on intentionality. Ask yourself: “What’s one small but meaningful way I can contribute today?” It could be speaking up in a meeting, sharing a new idea, or giving constructive feedback. Start small, and over time, those actions will build momentum.
The Ripple Effect of Confidence
Here’s the thing: a leader’s confidence — or lack of it — is never contained to just them. It ripples across the team and the organization. Confident leaders make decisions faster, foster trust, and create an environment where innovation thrives. Leaders lacking confidence, on the other hand, breed hesitation, mistrust, and missed opportunities.
If you’re nodding along to this, you’re not alone. Confidence isn’t a fixed trait — it’s a SKILL you can build over time. And that’s where my Security Stacking™ blueprint comes in.
Having confidence does not mean you’ll never make a mistake. You will make mistakes…ALOT of them!
You’ll get it wrong more often than you get it right.
But when you start stacking your securities — you’ll create a foundation that not only helps you recover from those mistakes but also empowers your team to thrive.
So, ask yourself a couple of questions:
How is your confidence — or lack of it — showing up in your workplace?
What would change if you started feeling more confident?
It’s time to find out.
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